First of all, I am biased to the Korean arts, I have been in them for 25 years. But I will say this, shop around. Most schools will let you try out the class for a time or two to see if you like it. I also would have to say your comment about Tae Kwon Do schools being watered down is correct, not many good TKD instructors around anymore, I was fortunate to be taught the pre sporting art. Nothing wrong with big organizations, if you can afford them. My opinion is to not worry about associations or organizations, just look for a good instructor that is in the realm of what you might be looking for.
Things to ask for, well, what are you interested in learning? Sport, self defense, traditional, modern??? Ask for the instructors background and rank. In my opinion, you want at least a 4th dan that has been teaching for at least 10 years. Not a 4th dan that started martial arts 5 years ago. Ask about contracts, fees, and extra fees (testing, gear, uniforms, etc.) Some have lots of extra hidden fees that add up to lots of money (especially the larger organizations.)
Lastly, don't worry about others perception of you. Take the art you want and be open minded and listen to your instructor(s), they may give you valuable information, if you listen to it.
J Stinson
Stinson's Korean Martial Arts Academy
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