Dealing with the loss...

[white devil]

Hey guys i really need your advice this time...
A few weeks ago i had my first boxing amateur fight..I was suppose to have it with a 0-0 guy but he didnt make weight..after having trained for so long and at the sight of the big crowd waiting for a fight to happen...i was offered to fight a heavier guy with more experience (1-3-1ko)

After not thinking about it too much,i took the fight.As soon i stepped into the ring i realized what i gotten myself into.The man was 6lbs over me but was a real slugger.Everything he threw connected..not matter how.He kept throwing his punches with all his weight forward and all jabs were possible knockout blows...(weird thing by the way...we fought at 165lbs and still wore 10oz gloves)

Ive received dangerous blows to my nose during the first two rounds.When it was time to stand up for the 3rd round i told my cornerman to throw the towel..i only wanted it to end..the beating that is.

I tought to myself that i shoudnt have accepted a fight like that on extremely short notice and with a guy with so much more experience and comfortability in the ring.So as my coach went to get the referee i told him to wait...i wiped the blood off of my nose and told him i was going for the last round..even if i was gonna get knocked out.

so i did and I got 2 standing knockdowns but i held on so hard..i even think i was unconcious for a while.I really wonder..even right now how the fight wasnt stopped by the referee.

But now..weeks later..even after accepting the loss as a huge boost of experience and as reason to try even harder...i just..dont feel like going to the gym anymore..last day i went for a visit and put on the gloves for a light sparring round..and it felt like the fear was implanted into me..i dont have the same agressivity and courage i used to have in the ring before the loss.I just dont feel like boxing no more...Even if it used to be the love of my life for so long.

I am a technical out-boxer..but i wonder if fights are meant to be won by raw power and agressive in-fighting over everything.(at least in amateur 3 rounders)..i mean no matter how hard i tried to set the distance...sluggers/rushers just charge at me with all their might and i cant even get a sidestep or evade them.

I really want to get back into the ring...but i just dont feel like it..i dont feel like running..not even lifting weights even if i used to do it religiously..i used to train everyday religiously but now..im just getting lazy and tired of trying.

after the fight everyone was proud of me because i fought it through to the end...and survived..and didnt get k.o.ed....and i know i did the right thing by not giving up..but somehow ..subconciously that loss is affecting me more than i tought..
please i need your support on this one

[Thai Bri]

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Analyse why you lost, and then put a plan in place to turn these weaknesses into strengths.

You cn come out of this lots better and stronger. Or you can give up and regret it forever.

Go with the first one. It is easier in the long run.

[Tom Yum]

Originally Posted by white devil

I am a technical out-boxer..but i wonder if fights are meant to be won by raw power and agressive in-fighting over everything.(at least in amateur 3 rounders)..i mean no matter how hard i tried to set the distance...sluggers/rushers just charge at me with all their might and i cant even get a sidestep or evade them.

I really want to get back into the ring...but i just dont feel like it..i dont feel like running..not even lifting weights even if i used to do it religiously..i used to train everyday religiously but now..im just getting lazy and tired of trying.

after the fight everyone was proud of me because i fought it through to the end...and survived..and didnt get k.o.ed....and i know i did the right thing by not giving up..but somehow ..subconciously that loss is affecting me more than i tought..
please i need your support on this one

Aw man, Go rent Rocky 3!

That story transcends the funk you are going through.

[osopardo]

Sounds like inferior coaching. A good coach or instructor is also a good psychologist / counselor, has seen this sort of thing in other fighters that he's trained before you and can get you through this phase (and it is just a phase!). Get the right kind of support to maximize your efforts, even if it means switching gyms or trainers or sparring partners.

The most important thing is to continue training regularly and to set a date for your next fight, so that you have a goal to work towards. If that next fight doesn't get you out of this funk, then you can consider quitting or taking up another sport.

[WuChi]

Good one for keeping going, I know the feeling. Im a featherweight or superfeatherweight, but my first MMa fight was with a guy who was 66kilo`s, and Im like 55-7. He was a big guy and wasnt shy of showing it. But it is part of the training curve, I got beat but the promoter always takes me back, Ive had better match-up and have only lost 2 times in total out of 8 fights. It gets you good credit and reputation with the promoters, stick in and well done.

[npk9]

Please don't take this the wrong way . . . .

Don't fight anymore - its as simple as that. If you don't have the heart to keep training and the loss of that fight hurt your ego more then your will to become a better fighter then stop fighting. If you keep pushing yourself into something that you don't want to do your next fight will be worst. You will have wasted not only your time but everyone else's around you. I would rather have someone be honest with themselves and come out straight forward then someone beating around the bush about it. You can't afford to beat around the bush when it comes to contact sports such as this.

So . . . what was your reason to start boxing in the first place?

[white devil]

If you don't have the heart to keep training and the loss of that fight hurt your ego more then your will to become a better fighter then stop fighting.

the fight didn't hurt my ego...i was the huge underdog..the guy had 4 fights and it was my first time in front of a crowd..i was terrified man.

What i'm going through is only subconsious...i don't think u can understand if you havent gone exactly what ive gone through...

Sounds like inferior coaching. A good coach or instructor is also a good psychologist / counselor, has seen this sort of thing in other fighters that he's trained before you and can get you through this phase

well first of...ive never had any personal coaching..ive always relied on friends to train me.My coach is a greedy hummer-sporting muay thai instructor(boxing/jkd too) who only teaches privatly for 50$/hour...The thing is i just asked him if i coud fight yet and he said sure.(i have been training on my own for about a year)

anyways..you guys are right,ill just set up the next goal and go for it..if it fails i can say ive tried.

[npk9]

Then why is there no "FIRE"??? Why the lose of drive in training???

Originally Posted by white devil

the fight didn't hurt my ego...i was the huge underdog..the guy had 4 fights and it was my first time in front of a crowd..i was terrified man.

What i'm going through is only subconsious...i don't think u can understand if you havent gone exactly what ive gone through...

I have gone through that - losing to a much more experienced opponent. Not particularly Boxing but in San Da. But I guess I wouldn't understand since I haven't gone EXACTLY what you have gone through.

If you're looking for cheerleader to try to get you back into the game because you lost then thats cool. But again, if you don't feel like training then that just says that you don't want it bad enough.

Again - what was the reason for starting boxing in the first place????

[white devil]

i like to fight..and i have a natural talent for it..i have good reach and good conditionning...ive always loved to train hard to be the best..i like competition..and ive always loved boxing since i was a kid..i like the thrill too..and i really dont like anything else as much

[npk9]

Originally Posted by white devil

i like to fight..and i have a natural talent for it..i have good reach and good conditionning...ive always loved to train hard to be the best..i like competition..and ive always loved boxing since i was a kid..i like the thrill too..and i really dont like anything else as much

That's great! All I'm saying is that you dedication needs to like your punches. Either fully committed or not. There's no shame in just backing out or taking a break. Just don't get stuck in middle because that just is bad all around.

[white devil]

thanks....

[Blue Wave Gym]

Originally Posted by Mike Brewer

White devil,
Don't take it too hard. If you fought well and you were prepared, then what you experienced is simply part of the sport. Video games and TV and movies would like us to believe that everyone is 100-0, but the fact is, even the best lose. Often, they lose early in their careers.

In fact, my guy, Donny, lost his first two fights in a row, and then went on to win his thrid, and in his fourth fight, he took the Novice Class in the Colorado State Golden Gloves. In many ways, it's good to get the losses out of the way early. It teaches you that you're mortal and that losing is a fact of life. Now, after feeling and experienceing it, you have nothing left to be scared of. It's no mystery - no secret monster out there waiting for you. You've been through it, and you're a better man for it. Get back in the gym and keep training for the next one.

Remember, brother, it's not how often you fall, but how often you get up that makes you a champion. Keep the prize in mind, and go out there and earn it. Earn it through your training, your work ethic, your character, and your will to prepare. If you've paid the price in training, you'll see the rewards in the ring, I promise you.

Good advice
Don't take it so hard kid the guy has a shit fight record 1-3 lol just take some time regroup nad get back sparring and traing I've been ther belive me ypu'll get throughtit the fact that you finished the fight means you have heart if you would hve quit thne maybe I'd tell ya to hang it up but you have strong fighting spirit. Just take a liitle time off and then redouble your efforts.

[Tom Yum]

Originally Posted by WuChi

Good one for keeping going, I know the feeling. Im a featherweight or superfeatherweight, .

Aha, now your name makes sense

[Piston]

To decide to fight a guy with far greater ring experience than yourself is a heck of a thing to do and something I have to respect. I can understand the feeling of a loss, and sure, for a while your bound to kick yourself around mentally, but later I found if anything, that it drove me to push harder. Was that the best I could give? Hell no. With more training and greater passion I WILL be better. My next opponent will receive no quarter. I will win.

[kanik]

Yo dude i cant understand what your going through as i havent gone through it myself, but i can guess, anyway i think staying and going through that fight was an admirable thing to do, though its only admirable, not great, a great thing to do would be to go through that fight, and think to yourself, thats the last time i am going to let some bum win! and try harder then you have ever tried before, you need to look on it in an inspiring light, so what if he won, at least now you know your limits, so you know to train more.... train, train, train, wooooo!!!!!! but yeh i can understand not wanting to train after an experiance such as that, my friend is going through a similar thing, hes been training wit me and, due to a bad experiance, has lost the will to continue, though i think its inspiring the fact that he has told me he has lost his will to fight, and train even, but he still goes and tryes hes hardest every training session at boxing, so thats all ya gotta do is go and try your hardest even if you dont feel up to it its all a matter of either doing it or giving up, theres only trwo ways to go so it aint complicated, the only obstacle is your mind, push through it and clear your head, sort out your prioritys.