personal space

[EmptyneSs]

i work in a retail store and have recently been having my personal space invaded by people. theres a superior at work who puts his arm on my shoulders sometimes and it makes me uncomfortable. also alot of times customers invade my personal space as well, like today a man came to talk to me, but he was so close to me he was right in my face and i could smell his nasty breathe, and it was horrible. being in these situations makes me very uncomfortable as a martial artist and i instinctively want to pull a stance or get away from them but this isnt really acceptable in a workplace. does anyone else have this problem and at what point is it acceptable for me push them the **** off me or take a physically defensive action? i dont want strangers getting that physically close to me.

[tunafisher]

Emptyness,

Before you push them off of you, why don't you just tell them that they are too close, or that you prefer not to be touched, etc.? You can do it with humor, to lighten things up. I can relate, some people don't respect personal or emotional boundries, and they get too intrusive. By being assertive, they may get pissed off or offended, but THAT IS THEIR PROBLEM NOT YOURS.

[Sensei Saki]

Are all EmptynessBefore you push them off of you why do not you just tell them that they too close or that you prefer not to be touched etc?Doing it with humor to lighten things up is not among my strongest traits.
Oh you can, can you?Will that accomplish your objective?

[Blue Wave Gym]

please tell me your not a guy, cause if you're a guy and this guy is putting his arm on your shoulder or arm or whatever else then he's a fucking fag.In either event whether your a guy or girl it's getting close to sexual harrassment on the job because he's your supperior.Ps I really hope your a girl cause I'm gettimng creeped out at the thought of a guy puting his arm around another guy(I'm assuming you're straight) If you are, then you could always turn the tables on him:the next time this perv touches you say"ya know I'm really into naked submission grappeling and I just can't wait to get you into the rear mount and put my hooks in you get some riding time

[shirase]

man you guys must really be homophobes or something. someone putting their hand on your shoulder doesnt mean they are gay, they might just be really open people or just grew up in a really friendly neighbourhood. But if it really bothers you that much then just tell them youd appreciate it if they didnt do it. Theres no need to get physical over something small like that.

[eXcessiveForce]

better never go to New York or Italy, or china for that matter. Their idea of person space is much different than areas like the midwest or south.

[Elfunko]

Ya, I think you'll find most the world has drastically different views than "if he touches me he's gay cause I'm a guy." Some of my friends are stoked when I pull em off balance and give em a bruddah hug, it's a welcome change from the conservative western handshake. To each his own though...

[OmaPlata]

just jump on the next persons back who does this and put them to sleep, this will give warning to the next person to stay clear

[Tant01]

Get a roll of red or blue or black tape and lay a strip of it on the floor to mark the line NOT to cross...

Some of the slower types might need a sign to stay behind the line.

[lopezma]

You must confront the situation with the superior. There will be an awkward time (2 days-week long), but if this person is mature, everything should be fine after that. If there continues to be a problem, you will have to go up the ladder. By that I mean you will have to speak with their supervisor. Hopefully, it won't come to that. As far as the customers, I would step back, spin and KICK the snot out of them! Seriously, Just step back. If you have to step for more than say 3 or 4 times, take them as a moron; and understand that there are some things we just can't control as much as we would like to!

[HtTKar]

Tell the guy with the stinky breath that his breath stinks. He'll be embarrassed and back off. His breath is his problem. He shouldn't make it yours.

Next time your boss invades your personal space or grabs you or whatever, just ask "Whats up, why are you putting your hand on my shoulder? It kinda bothers me" He'll understand if he's cool. Some people just need more personal space than others. Just make sure you tell people that they're bothering you; otherwise your frustrations will just build up and you'll explode, or youll start talking crap behind their back. Might as well get it out of the way as soon as possible.