Report from the Muslim world.

[E1am]

An English buddy of mine spent the last year traveling. He spent a lot of time in Pakistan, Kashmir, Iran, Central Asia, and the Middle East. He's sent me a couple of E-mails on his thoughts of the area. He and I are very in to history and politics and he knows his stuff. I thought you might like to read his impressions that he sent me by e-mail. Some of it is out of context and maybe won't make sense. This stuff ain't politically correct and is sarcastic, so if you'll get offended don't read.
-E

P.S. The dashed lines are the start of a new e-mail.

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What happened today was totally disgusting. I'm usually against
the sending of cruise missiles as it usually makes the dude
popular locally. like when the class rebel is punished. But
whoever did it must be found and killed. There is no other
alternative.

I wonder if my mentor is OK. he works on wall street.

First thing i did was get on the net and check how the markets
responded. Shit we don't need more downturn.

----------------------
The ****ing bastards!!! I'm stuck on the TV news too and this
shit makes my blood boil. I've always prided myself on being
able to look at news stories from a detached point of view but
this time it's different. What really pissed me off was the
people waving out of the windows before the building collapsed,
and jumping out of the windows.

It is truly like a movie. it reminds me of Deep Impact when NYC
gets wiped out by a tidal wave. I remember thinking how paranoid
this new yorker was when i met him in 93'. He was shit scared of
terroists after the world trade centre attack that time.

At all costs avoid a ground war in Afghanistan. The pathan are
the hardest people in the world. I saw some crazy shit in that
part of the world. The british had 3 wars with the afghans. They
lost the first 2 won the third. They won the 3rd only cos'
aeroplanes had been developed by that stage. In the first one
out of a force of 10,000 only one single englishman came out of
afghanistan alive.

Also a ground war will make the muslim world hate u even more.
They hate the states so much. if it rains it's an american
conspiracy, if there's drought it's an american conspiracy. But
as PJ o' Rourke said ,when he was in Beirut in the 80s, about
hezbollah fighters shooting their AKs into the air, "they all
ask me for green cards".

You need an operation without long term fighting in afghanistan.
That means special forces. Unlike many armies the british army
enjoys fighting. So that's a solution if they want to avoid US
casulaties. BTW every Brit PM since 1945 has had Churchill
pretensions. Tony's just doing that. But my paper took the piss
out of him big time; 'The man who caved in to the IRA now wants
to take on world terroism'.

My mentor still hasn't contacted me. For some reason the last
mail i got from him 2 days ago sits in my new mail folder even
though i've checked it.

I'll draw the muslim out with some psycological techniques
taught to me by a NY psycology professor.

But like u said the world will get angry over its victims from
this latter day tower of babel.
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Well what i thought from the start is now being pointed out. if
u attack afghanistan what about pakistan. The military dictator
(or chief executive as he's called in pak) was never really
criticised by the yanks after the coup. I deduce he's their man.
Only one paki pm has ever gone against the US. He was hanged by
his successor, general zia. The US ally during the soviet
invasion of Afghanistan. But how can he go against paki opinion.
The pakis hate the US, whilst being desperate to get there.
Muslims hate the US.

During by last year i've been hanging out with a lot of these
heretics (muslims). A common theme of discussions is how america
is conspiring against islam, how they're cruel people, how the
west hates islam. People go crazy, especially as i can **** with
them. They start reeling off a list of examples they've read in
the paper about yank imperialism against islam. "What about
palestine? what about iraq? What about fiji?" Hang on i said
fiji has nothing to do with islam. This made them madder. This
one bloke said yanks were cruel (despite never having met one.
But in his town brother tells father sister been eyeing guys up,
father shoots daughter and brother gets a greater inheritance.

This is one reason i got pissed off with asians. They can't be
rational which leads to great hypocrasy.

So muslims hate US. Except in iran where they think the british
are causing all their problems. They blame the brits for putting
Khomeni into power.

But to give muslims their due the west is very anti-islamic. The
christians (a bunch of murderous fanatics in the form of the
crusaders) started the wars against islam. Even today it is
against the law for muslim girls to wear head scarfs in french
schools. A total crime against religious freedom. Plus, for
electoral reasons, the US is pro Israel. Journalists have failed
to point out that hitting Jew York was an extra coup for the
terroists. It's the world centre of Judaism. I'm sure israeli
PMs have to answer back there.

As far as i can make out (from reading and experiencing it)
islam is a very peaceful religion. And jihad does not mean holy
war as the papers say. But all the same whoever was behind this
crime must burn in hell.
--------------------------

I was on the afghan border afew times in the last year. And the
terrain is tough - imagine a footpath the width of your foot cut
into a near vertical mountainside with 2000ft below you. The
locals just run along them and don't think twice. One dude took
me along a path like this and i just started screaming at him;
"you ****ing arsehole, this is going to kill me u ****ing ****".
This path the width of my foot was crumbling away, to cap it off
i got the shits while on this path and had to pull my pants down
as soon as i was on a broader section.

Yeah the palestinians have been ****ed around by the arabs so
much. Other arab countries have taken palestinian land, they
ignored the palestinians. Only supporting them when it was
politically convenient to do so. There are some pretty gruesome
palestinian refugee camps in lebanon. Of course saudi and all
its dollars is only a few hundred kilometres away.

The pakis always told me that 'we are muslims, all other muslims
are our brothers'. But as ALY the french muslim said pakistan is
a country ready for balkanisation. I don't think the pakis
realise what shit they're talking. For example in south pakistan
there has been a virtual war between the local sindi population
and mohajar (muslim refugees from india at the time of
partition).

It's a heavily armed country, everyone has guns. In the tribal
areas on the afghan border every male over the age of 12 carries
an automatic rifle at all times, they live in virtuaql
fortresses with slits for windows and there are gun and hashish
shops. This is the same tribe as the taliban, Pushtun. Often
called the Pathan by the british. They truly are the hardest
guys in the world.

I wonder if a conflict against terroism could be successful.
After all the wogs have a massive military prescence in kashmir
and they have many problems. But in syria in the early 80s assad
wiped out the muslim brotherhood. They were causing lots of
problems and threatening to take power. He cornered them in a
city called Hama and then destroyed Hama. They never gave him
any more problems.
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Paki food was so bad. if u wanna eat paki food u gotta do it in
england. Some ex-Cia dude was saying the reason they've failed
to infiltrate any networks over there was that agents weren't
willing to go there for years long missions only to get the
shits and not get laid.

In Peshawar (the most exciting city in the world on the Afghan
border and packed full of Pushtun)there is a US consulate and
the only Taliban consulate in the world. The stupid american
bitch who was nearly murdered in the gun making town went there
to get all the usual advice (i.e. not have a usual routine).
They told her they were only open as a defacto consulate for
afghanistan i.e. they can have contact with the taliban in
peshawar. But i'm absolutely sure this consulute has now been
closed.

The Pushtun were left alone by the Moghuls, the british and post
independence paki governments. You can't fight these people. The
tribal areas have defacto independence. Like i said everyone
carries an automatic years and 100 year old blood fueds are not
unusual. When i went to the tribal areas i hired a gunman.
Smugglers live in huge fortresses containing drug factories. But
hospitality in this part of the world is the best in the world.
They're fiercly proud of the way they treat guests and of their
fighting ability. The ju-jitsu muslim is also ethnically
Pushtun.

More Paki hypocrasy. They slag westerners off for being
materialistic, working hard and only thinking about money. But
these bastards all want to come to the west to make money and
and have to work hard to do so. (I met this paki taxi driver
based in the States. He offered me a job as a taxi driver in
springfield, virginia. This is where i was offered a job with
some company 3 years ago after i applied to them on the net).
But anyway pakis slag us off for being materialistic and this is
one of the most corrupt countries in the world. Corrupt
officials live in badly constructed versions of the white house,
where the house takes up all the garden space and the high
security wall blokes the view of the house. So there is no way
anyone can ever see its garish features. People wear fake
designer watches, they wear it loose so it always hangs loose at
the end of the wrist so people can see it. Smart belts are very
popular with fake Nike or Addidas golden buckles. People adjust
their posture so the fake brand name buckle kind of sticks out
before their body.

The pakis always slag us off for being non-religious so it
really pissed them off when i said america was one of the most
religious places on the planet.

A couple of times i pretended to be muslim for a laugh. People
could believe this more as i had a beard at the time. One time
at a mosque some fundamentalists asked if i was muslim. My
adrenelin got going, i said yes and they all bear hugged me.
Then the loudspeakers started blaring 'Allah akbah' and they
asked me to lead the prayer. I basically ran out of there.
Another time in south lebabnon this arab i was hanging out with
told his fundamentalist mate i was a muslim. He looked shocked
and i started shouting 'Are u saying white people can't be
muslims?'. This embarassed him a lot.

By the way i'm getting love letters from a 17 year old turkish
girl who wears a head scarf and is ultra religious.

[bobby_steeles]

Originally posted by E1am

By the way i'm getting love letters from a 17 year old turkish
girl who wears a head scarf and is ultra religious.

yeah, join the club...