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Old 01-13-2004, 06:36 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default mail order black belt/instant killing machine

I think I just found something WORSE than a McDojo! check out http://www.martialartsweapons.net/
Get your 2nd degree black belt without stepping into a gym! This guy has something where you order his books and become an instant "fighting machine". It's pretty funny (but still disturbing because this guy is serious)

Here are just a few things you'll learn (lol) from his books in just a few days:

How to take full power strikes
How to take full power kicks
How to break boards on your ribs with a baseball bat
How to break boards on your chest lying on a Bed of Nails
How to bend knives on your neck
How to knock down anyone with 1 finger
How to block any punch with one hand
How to block any kick effortlessly
Super flexibility secrets
Unbendable arm
How not to be choked
The one punch knock out
How to control anyone without your hands
How to take full power body strikes without being hurt
How to block any kick with ease
The secrets to super flexibility
Feel like Superman by increase your KI
Knock an attacker to the ground using one finger
Break boards with a one-inch punch!
How to defend yourself against any weapon
The secret strategies that give you an edge even against with multiple attackers

LOL!
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Old 01-13-2004, 11:47 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I wonder how many people died after they bought those cd's and tried to learn with real weapons. You know what I also saw the title picture for that book how to get the perfect waistline and I swear that chick was nowhere near perfect lol. I wonder if I can sucker anybody into buying just so I could get a hold of it and pirate it for 25 cents each.
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Old 01-14-2004, 08:14 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by adacas
I wonder how many people died after they bought those cd's and tried to learn with real weapons. You know what I also saw the title picture for that book how to get the perfect waistline and I swear that chick was nowhere near perfect lol. I wonder if I can sucker anybody into buying just so I could get a hold of it and pirate it for 25 cents each.

Less than the amount of people buying X-Ray glasses
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Old 01-15-2004, 04:29 AM   #4 (permalink)
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sounds like a winner!
why waste hundreds of dollars on a McDojo black belt?
I think what we need are drive through karate schools.
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Old 01-15-2004, 07:51 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Adacas pulls up to a taekwondo drive thru..."Yeah can I order two large green belts a medium brown belt and a small blackbelt so my son can have the confidence of a man?"
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Old 01-16-2004, 12:12 AM   #6 (permalink)
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yeah yellow bamboo is tight. I could take take a whole army just by sticking my tongue out at them. That isn't the only thing yellow bamboo taught me how to use my tongue for if you know what I mean ladies....

Yeah thats right I'm talking about licking the sides of the ice cream cone for when it melts and starts dripping and stuff making big mess. Girls don't like that so I do them a favor.
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