WMDs

nutter · 05-30-2006, 07:12 PM

As we all know right USA has the most WMDs of anyone right and is the only country to have used them in anger too right.

Do you believe that Iraq had WMDs in 1999?

GQchris · 05-30-2006, 07:57 PM

weapons of mass distraction

Troll Virus · 05-30-2006, 08:01 PM

Fred walks into his house with a sheep tucked under his arm. He carries it upstairs and into the bedroom where his wife is in bed, reading a magazine.

"Honey," says Fred, "This is the pig I've been screwing when you're not available."

"Fred," the wife says, "That's not a pig. That's a sheep."

"Shut up," says Fred. "I wasn't talking to you."

nutter · 05-30-2006, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Troll Virus

I won - http://p072.ezboard.com/ftaekwondo67...cID=1938.topic

What you win mate?

Troll Virus · 05-30-2006, 08:16 PM

While I was driving down the A19 the other day, (going a little faster than I should have) I passed under a bridge only to see a copper the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The copper pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronising smirk, asked:
"Runway too short?"
To which I replied, "I'm late for work".
To which he asked, "What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher", I responded.
The copper was surprised and confused "A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well" I said, " I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I get my other hand in, and then I slowly start to stretch the hole, until it's about six feet."
Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six foot asshole?"
To which I politely replied," You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge....."

Speeding ticket: $105.00

Court costs: $45

Look on copper's face: Priceless

nutter · 05-30-2006, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Troll Virus

While I was driving down the A19 the other day, (going a little faster than I should have) I passed under a bridge only to see a copper the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The copper pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronising smirk, asked:
"Runway too short?"
To which I replied, "I'm late for work".
To which he asked, "What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher", I responded.
The copper was surprised and confused "A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well" I said, " I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I get my other hand in, and then I slowly start to stretch the hole, until it's about six feet."
Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six foot asshole?"
To which I politely replied," You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge....."

Speeding ticket: $105.00

Court costs: $45

Look on copper's face: Priceless

Why do you keep cut and pasting jokes mate? Try coming up with your own material right mate. Except that maybe you ain't funny, not even by jock standards right.

Troll Virus · 05-30-2006, 08:57 PM

A British company is developing computer chips that store music in women's breast implants.
This is a major breakthrough.
Women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

Troll Virus · 05-30-2006, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mike Brewer

I like this tactic. It seems to be working. Keep it up, TV!

http://www.amazingjokes.com/

Adding options to a poll is good too.

View Poll Results: Do you believe that Iraq had WMD in 1999?
Yeah, of course they did. Bush said so, so it must be true innit.	1	50.00%
No they didn't mate.	1	50.00%
Voters: 2. You may not vote on this poll

05-30-2006, 07:12 PM	#1 (permalink)
nutter Registered User Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 567 Groans: 0 Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts	WMDs As we all know right USA has the most WMDs of anyone right and is the only country to have used them in anger too right. Do you believe that Iraq had WMDs in 1999? __________________ My kind of life

05-30-2006, 07:57 PM	#2 (permalink)
GQchris Registered User Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Alameda County, California Posts: 767 Groans: 0 Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts	weapons of mass distraction __________________ Owner of a lonely heart.. much better than a owner of a broken heart...

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05-30-2006, 08:01 PM	#3 (permalink)
Troll Virus Premiere Member Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Under a Bridge Posts: 808 Groans: 0 Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts	Fred walks into his house with a sheep tucked under his arm. He carries it upstairs and into the bedroom where his wife is in bed, reading a magazine. "Honey," says Fred, "This is the pig I've been screwing when you're not available." "Fred," the wife says, "That's not a pig. That's a sheep." "Shut up," says Fred. "I wasn't talking to you."

05-30-2006, 08:16 PM	#5 (permalink)
Troll Virus Premiere Member Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Under a Bridge Posts: 808 Groans: 0 Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts	While I was driving down the A19 the other day, (going a little faster than I should have) I passed under a bridge only to see a copper the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The copper pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronising smirk, asked: "Runway too short?" To which I replied, "I'm late for work". To which he asked, "What do you do?" "I'm a rectum stretcher", I responded. The copper was surprised and confused "A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?" "Well" I said, " I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I get my other hand in, and then I slowly start to stretch the hole, until it's about six feet." Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six foot asshole?" To which I politely replied," You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge....." Speeding ticket: $105.00 Court costs: $45 Look on copper's face: Priceless

05-30-2006, 08:57 PM	#7 (permalink)
Troll Virus Premiere Member Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Under a Bridge Posts: 808 Groans: 0 Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts	A British company is developing computer chips that store music in women's breast implants. This is a major breakthrough. Women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

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