x4FoSho4x

Hi i am 17 years old and im in a tough situation....

I was walking to Mcdonalds with two of friends (they cant really defend them selves that well) and outside of MCdonalds this kid that I used to be cool with was like "Dont talk to me". i was like what do u mean? n he said "jus go upon your business" i buy my stuff, i leave and he says to me "why we you talkin shit??" and i have no idea what hes talkin about. hes with a lot of ppl (gang) i dont answer. and he says "ill give you 5 seconds to get down that block" "n im like are you serious wtf?" and i see he has brass knuckles in his hand along with a knife in his back pocket. so i leave. but im frustrated that i didnt do anything despite his obvious advantage in the fight and i was embarrassed in front of many people .http://www.defend.net/deluxeforums/i...es/redface.gif http://www.defend.net/deluxeforums/i...milies/mad.gif

and he was sayin to his friends as i was leaving "i kno where that nikka lives" now being involed in gangs previously....and kind of currently....i dont want the same thing to happen what happened before. I had to move because of something similar. As you can see this kid doesnt fight fairly and i dont want him to persist with this. i am an sort of an experienced fighter street fighting and martial arts. ive been in martial arts mostly all of my life but have recently quit. . but i dont know what i should do. if u were in my situation what would you do???http://www.defend.net/deluxeforums/i...s/confused.gif

bigboywasim

Best thing you can do is avoid this guy at all costs. If he comes near your house call the cops. If he follows you call the cops. Don't go to places that this guy hangs out. Remember if someone has a weapon and is trying to hurt you just run, hide and get help (cops). If you can't run then do whatever he or she says if your life is in danger.

It depends where you live. If you live in a place there are a lot of violence then I would always have body armor on and keep a gun or knife with me as long as it is not against the law. In some states you need a license or something to carry a weapon. I would get that if you living in a bad environment. Going to places with someone is also a good thing. Best thing above all this is to move to a safe place.

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Mike Brewer

Hard truth, brother, but I want you to know up front that I am saying this out of genuine concern for your situation and not out of any disrespect to you personally.

Your first problem is that you have chosen to surround yourself with a poisonous crowd of people. If you're still banging, even if you're still just hanging out with that crowd, you're bringing this stuff on yourself. When someone is facing severe alcoholism and they need to quit drinking, they stop going to bars and hanging out with drunks. When a junkie need to kick the habit, they have to stop going to coke parties and hanging out with self-medicating addicts. If you want the negative aspects of the life to stop screwing with you now, you need to cut ties to that life. Otherwise, you're like the guy who says he needs to quit drinking while he's sitting on a barstool ordering another round.

Now, at risk of sounding preachy, here's some more hard truth. From what you've said, I don't think you're as concerned with defending yourself as you are with beating this guy up. Real self-defense in this situation would be to quit hanging around with the gang crowd and inviting all those negative things into your life. REAL self-defense means living so that your enemies never think to attack you in the first place. By staying involved in the life, even on the fringes, you're begging for this kind of stuff. Someone told me once that the "hands on method is the least likely method of success." That's where you're at right now. You're stuck thinking in terms of the least effective method for solving your problems. Since you asked for advice, I'll give you some. Don't worry about how to beat a guy up when he has friends and a knife. Worry about how to stop letting that kind of people in your life. You do that, and I'll bet most of your problems will go away.

x4FoSho4x

I know i try but all my previous friends (gang related) just keep coming back. i try to ignore them. and i moved. but they still come around every once in a while. Now this kid. i dont know why he is acting like this but when i tried to calm him down or talk it out he completely ignored all off my efforts. I dont want to end up in a worse situation than i already am. what if he comes around my house when im alone? what shall i do?

Mike Brewer

Partner, it's a sad tale that you're having a tougher time standing up to your "friends" than your enemies. In my experience, gangs offer a sense of belonging, of safety, of brotherhood, and of respect. If your sworn brothers who respect you and back you can't respect your wishes to live a more "mainstream" lifestyle, what does that tell you about their respect for you? If they don't respect the idea that you don't want to live the life anymore, what does it say about their concern and "brotherhood" for you?

You're surrounded by parasites, my man. And the answer to the question "what if he comes around when you're all aone?" is a simple matter of decideing what kind of life you choose for yourself. As a man, you stand alone sometimes. You do what you must, and you do what is in line with your character as a man. You've laid down some tough obstacles for yourself through bad choices and screwed up priorities. Overcoming that is the next step in growing up. Learning how to stand up on your own, without the so-called support of bullshitters and parasites like the people you've chose n to surround yourself with thus far is the real obstacle. This joker at Mc Donald's is a symptom, not the disease. Fix your life and the symptoms will go away.

In order to do that, though, you have to mean it. None of this "try" bullshit. Either do it or don't. You step up and be a man instead of hiding behind the old gang nonsense. You live a good life, and you abide by morals and character instead of some perverted sense of loyalty that only works one way. If you do that - if you learn and commit to living well, and someone still chooses to put your life at risk, then you defend yourself however you need to, and you go right on living a good and moral life.

Tom Yum

Well said, Mike.

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Love it, leave it or fix it.

x4FoSho4x

Your right. I must cut my ties with all these people immediately. I gotta get things together. thanks for all the input guys. It really helped.

Mike Brewer

Best of luck with it, my friend. It's always hard to turn your back on people you once called "friend" but trust me, when you realize that those same "friends" are the source and reason for most of your problems, the difficulty will subside and you'll realize it was all worth it to get your own life in order.

Sagacious Lu

Sometimes when you need to change your life the best way to do it is to move somewhere completely new; as in to another state. If you're 17 you should be done with high school pretty soon, and you might want to consider a change of scenery. You could choose an environment where there isn't as much gang activity and surround yourself with a completely different type of person. If you can stay out of trouble until you're 18 and finsished with high school you'll find that you're young enough to completely reinvent yourself without too much trouble.

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Mr. Arieson

I won't go into as great a detail as Mike did ( listen to him-he knows a thing or two!) except to say that yeah, you have to leave your lifestyle. You can't have it both ways.

You should look at going away to college, or failing that, join the military! Get off the "block" and start doing something with your life. It worked for me!

TKD Student

Tough situation... I would do as someone else said: call the cops.
But if I had nowhere to hide I would fight to the end. But that's me.

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I'm not stupid, I just have bad luck when I'm thinking.

shadex

I had a great conversation with another street fighter martial artist a year ago. We both agreed that now a days you can't just fight someone.

What always happens is if your good and lucky you beat the crap out of 1 guy, he comes back with friends and if your lucky again, you beat the crap out of 3 guys. 20 fights later your facing 20 guys at a time. No matter how good you are, your going to have an off day. It only takes one loss for them to put you in the hospital.

I've not been envolved with many street fights post 23 years old. When i have here is my strategy. If i'm facing someone with a gun, i will litterly just sit there and let them beat me up. Can't really call someone a pussy for not fighting back when someone has a gun. Just dont cry.

If they have a knife, and your not comfortable with knife fighting, run or get to a crowded place.

If your comfortable with knife fighting and are willing to put your life on the line, or they dont have a knife, and there is no way out, beat that guy to the point that it strikes fear in his friends. I dont wish to endorce brutality. One thing however is true, if you kick a guy in the nuts repeativly, and crush his face in, his friends will see it. They will be forced to ask is it worth it. But on that same tolken be ready to go to jail, and pay for his hospital bed.

In the end you have to figure out is it worth it or not. Honestly, in highschool, its 90% just them trying to see if you'll get punked and cry. And dont put to much faith into being embarssed. One of the most common things to do these days is for little wannabe gang bangers to jump guys learning martial arts to prove that they rule. Well, if bruce lee was alive i could knock his ass out with a sucker punch to the back of his head and i sure as hell could kick the crap out of every gracie while there asleep. It really doesn't prove anything, because on my best day i couldn't beat either of them one on one in a real street fight.

shadex

Ohh one more thing. Get a little baggy, and fill it with flour and ground cayanee pepper. Keep it in a pocket. Next time these idiots start getting ready to try to fight you (because idiots always have the initial pressing phaze) throw the mixed powder in there eyes and walk away. Don't even need to fight them, the cayenne pepper will do the work.

Mike Brewer

So your answer to the guy with the gun is to submit and take it?

That didn't work so well in some other places.....

Like Columbine, Virginia Tech, Flight 77...

medic06

The cayane pepper won't stop everybody, especially considering where I'm from (south Louisiana). Your concoction is a good start for a gumbo. Just need to add some oil, butter, or magarine, heat up to make a nice thick roux. . . .