MT: What do you think of men and women sparring?

[treelizard]

Originally Posted by Michael Wright

None of my male students, regardless of what I have put them through in order to develop, have ever come to me and said "you're doing this just because I am a man". Interesting.

And your female students tell you that you're just doing things because they're women? Interesting.

[Michael Wright]

Originally Posted by treelizard

And your female students tell you that you're just doing things because they're women? Interesting.

Only one. Who, even more interestingly, was the last person I would ever have expected to play the gender card. The discussion wasn't even face to face, I found out after it had been plastered on an internet forum.

Hey ho, you live and learn.

[treelizard]

Originally Posted by Michael Wright

Only one. Who, even more interestingly, was the last person I would ever have expected to play the gender card. The discussion wasn't even face to face, I found out after it had been plastered on an internet forum.

Hey ho, you live and learn.

Yeah, the person who was talking smack about one of my coaches also did it on an internet forum. Even though he's only met the guy twice and knows nothing of him or how he teaches, he found it fitting to say that the reason we get along is because he must give women preferential treatment. (Which I guess is easier to swallow than assuming the guy didn't like him because of his really shitty attitude...but that's an assumption on my part as well.)

But yeah, it sucks to read things online when someone could have just brought something up face to face...no matter what the situation is.

[Knuckles&Knees]

Originally Posted by treelizard

Not to mention the fact that in many martial arts the gender politics are pretty insane and women have to be careful not to speak

And I have very little sympathy for men that get injured by women because their ego won't allow them to tap out. I hope they don't have any sympathy for me because I've not tapped out when I should have in the past because I was trying to be all tough and not look too girly.

Just my judgment: for better or worse I think ego is a fact of life for humans - and apparently if you ever look at other animals when it comes to peeing territory or a slab of meat they seem to have egos too .

I think egos are like sexual drives for people, everyone for the most part has them. Really, I became pretty impressed with how the culture and sport of boxing seemed to just accept this so human aspect to people rather than ignore it an over-moralize on the issue. Boxing, from the impression I have been given, just seems to adjust the training to a persons confidence level and skill ability. A very cocky guy, especially one not really proven (meaning many pro or amateur fights), might be put in the ring to spar with someone that can take his ego down a peg or two.

I know at my age, from having talked to my male friends that are my age, many men *fear starting* boxing when they are no longer very young men. Because they fear potential embarrassment from being beaten by a 14 year old.

So, egos like sexual arousal are just something human beings deal with.

And I didn't even begin to mention all the weirdness with guys, like the ones who are...um, why is this guy watching me while I'm doing assisted pullups? And does he really want to spot me or does he just want his hands on my side? Or, it's interesting how this guy keeps accidentally touching me during this stick drill, HMMMM.

Haha! Yes, that sounds like the male animal. Bad I know. Men's minds are very easily turned toward a sexualized thought. Men can't really help it (their actions they can though), it's part of the male makeup, we should collect disability for it. [smile]

Seriously though, people need to bring some maturity to their training environment and separate training from how they might flirt or whatever... out on the street. A guy should not be behaving like that toward people of the female sex while training. It hinders her and his growth.

And I have very little sympathy for men that get injured by women because their ego won't allow them to tap out. I hope they don't have any sympathy for me because I've not tapped out when I should have

Just to point out, in sparring situations like boxing, there is no "tapping out." That experienced MMA woman that fought Alia Ali found that out... and broke one of the biggest cardinal rules in boxing during her fight and pummeling - she turned her back on her opponent.

Tap out does not exist, you just have to endure the affliction. It's an *endurance* aspect to boxing that I don't think many people appreciate.

[treelizard]

Yeah, I went to see boxing live for my first time a few months ago and it was a totally different animal from what I'm used to watching. Luckily for the losers the ref cut a few fights short for medical reasons.

[Little Apple]

Interesting point Knuckles: I'm a little more acquainted with boxing than MMA, but they have their own categories in my head. I always knew, but I guess I never noticed, that in MMA you can tap- and in boxing you can't. Just one of those things I took for granted~ like the difference in their gloves: never thought about it, "Of course it's that way."

I know I digress here, but my brain is just wrapping around the fact that MMA'ers can admit defeat; but boxers have to be defeated. Interesting.

Of course the tap is there because otherwise the fighters could be irreparably damaged, and in boxing any holds or clinches are broken up- but it's interesting.

[treelizard]

I guess when I've boxed we were either doing touch point sparring or wearing tons of protection... whereas when I grapple either we're running drills or we're trying to submit...though luckily the majority of the people I've rolled with are slow and controlled...

[treelizard]

I guess one other thing I forgot to bring up which is particularly useful for women training with all guys is that things got a lot easier for me when I decided I will build rapport with every single guy in any MA school I'm a part of or any class I take. It's just a good idea in general and helps build a stronger community but I bet it'd be less of a sacrifice for someone to roll with me even if they're not getting much of a workout if we're, like, friends... and they'd probably be more likely in open mat to give me pointers and let me drill something (etc.) So I always bring ice, arnica, dit da jow, etc. with me, I try to point out when someone's improved at a technique, remember when people have upcoming fights/meets/etc. so I can ask them about it, try my hardest not to talk shit about anyone at the gym/class/dojo/etc.

Anyway, I just thought of this thread because one of my coworkers was telling me about her sister who was a wrestler. She beat a guy in 19 seconds and he dropped out of school!