Motivation to train...

[Rockwell]

If you're a woman, what motivates you to train?

If you're a man, what motivates your girlfriend, wife, female friend, etc. to train?

My girlfriend is a great athlete with a realistic attitude about self defense and athletic training. She knows it's important and she knows that there are no magic short cuts. We have trained together a bit, and she says she'd like to do more, but we live in different cities right now and we don't like to use all the time we see each other just for fighting/self-defense training. She has a very busy schedule, and just doesn't seem motivated to seek training somewhere else. Part of that is just a comfort thing, I know, and I certainly don't want to put pressure on her to do something she doesn't feel like doing. I guess I'm just curious to see what motivates other women to train. I know some have suffered physical assault...others have a strong fear of such assault...others simply got into the training and loved it. Just wondering if you all have any insight on this. Thanks for sharing.

Best,

Jeff

[terry]

My wife just shakes her head at the blade and impact weapon stuff I do from FMA and KK. She calls it 'that stick stuff' and just walks away. But she likes boxing and Muay Thai.

She runs about 5 miles a day and has recently broken a couple of state records for power-lifting. (Pretty good after giving birth to twins less than two years ago, eh?) I think she likes the cardio workout and the hitting and the fact that she gets to spend some time alone with me away from the kids--kind of our date night out. She also likes the big hug I give her after a good round. She expects her "big, sweaty hug" if she did a good job.

Terry

[Rockwell]

Thanks Terry...I am hoping to get her to that point. She always enjoys it once she trains, just getting her in the gym when I'm not around seems to be the trouble...


Any other insights? C'mon guys and gals...

[terry]

Jill has pretty much dropped martial arts for the next two months since she is prepping for the worlds in power lifting. And we've radically changed the tone of training to a much more agressive and 'you don't get any respect unless you earn it' atmosphere.

This approach is not at all appropriate for a recreational athlete or hobbyist (it would probably scare them off), but it is the right tone if you intend to stand and deliver against the Russians. In particular, a lot of agressiveness is needed for the deadlift. Whereas the bench is much more of a technical effort, the deadlift is all out war. So, one of the prep strategies on the team is to keep people angry, off balance and turn people against each other. Then you teach them to focus their aggressiveness into one massive explosion. (We have four women going to the worlds.) You start by going to one person and say, "Person X [your teammate] believes that they can blow you away." Then you do the same thing to the others. That works great for men, but the women talk much more amongst themselves and figure it out. Thus, I have to find another method to keep her on edge. So, while I used to give her almost exclusively positive feedback with a lot of hugging and kidding around now it is much more serious. Nothing is acceptible but her all-out personal best every time she lifts. We'll see how it turns out.

Another thing that works is to put a big white board up in the gym and put everybody's personal bests up for everybody to see. Interestingly, this seems to bring out the competitive spirit better for the women than for the men.

Terry

[MA Fan]

Hi,

I initially started out because I needed to get fit and found it cheaper than joining a gym. After the first lesson I bought a Gi, two books on MA and looked forward to the next lesson.

I can genuinely say I do it for the love of it now. Its the only 'thing' I do for me, I feel its the only time I am myself...other ocassions I am a work colleague, daughter, friend, etc. My time in the dojo is about personal advancement and discipline and likewise when training at home.

I really do enjoy the company of like minded people at class too. There is a certain type of person that stays in MA and the majority of people I have met so far have been lovely.

[bearraven]

I certainly understand the need for motivation! About 7 months ago, I moved several hundred miles away from my dojo. Not only do I miss my karate brothers and sisters, I haven't been able to consistently motivate myself to train. I was training upwards of 20 hours per week, and now I struggle to do 5 hours/week.

What I use that seems to help is reading martial arts magazines, books, articles, etc., or watching martial arts movies (good or bad, doesn't matter). This seems to inspire me to get off my butt, but I have to go with that feeling and not hope that it will last for a couple of hours until it's more convenient.

Also, martial arts is not a team sport and as such, in my humble opinion, the vast majority of motivation has to be self-motivation. One has to want it badly enough--for themselves.

there's my two cents.
BearRaven

[terry]

Originally posted by terry
Jill has pretty much dropped martial arts for the next two months since she is prepping for the worlds in power lifting. And we've radically changed the tone of training to a much more agressive and 'you don't get any respect unless you earn it' atmosphere.

So, while I used to give her almost exclusively positive feedback with a lot of hugging and kidding around now it is much more serious. Nothing is acceptible but her all-out personal best every time she lifts. We'll see how it turns out.

This just in...

At the worlds Jill took 1st place in the bench press in her weight class (132 lbs.) and 3rd place in the deadlift.

T