Why I don't do Kali

[medic06]

I read enough to get the gyst of this thread, but not every post so forgive me if there is repetition.
It seems a lot of us have an attitude that as soon as a serious fight (i.e. not a bar room scuffle) starts, that it is kill or be killed. I do believe that if someone is using verbal threats or trying to intimidate with words or posture/proximity, then it is ok to respond with physical force. A few people may disagree but I think most of us realize that sort of intimidation as an invitation to fight and a promise of violence, which is exactly what it is. That is still how our animal beings are hardwired. However, this doesn't rule out degrees of retaliation. A fight, or your perception of the encounter, can go through several escalations before you reach lethal force.
I believe that the ideal outcome of any fight is minimal injury to both combatants. If someone attacks me armed or not, my greatest goal would be to pin him to the ground and let him exhaust himself, then walk away leaving him sweaty and embarassed. If the fight needs to end quicker than that, then I can choke him or maybe knock him out. If the fight needs te end faster I can try to break a bone. If it escalates beyond all these things then I can draw my knife.
Now, I realize that due to factors of multiple attackers, skill level, weapons, what have you, that these decisions may be taken out of my hands. I realize that this escalation may occur completely in my head in the second that two men pull knives from their pockets. My point is, I feel morally obligated to go through that escalation and reach the highest degrees of violence only when it is forced on me. I train to the ultimate goal of ending conflict peacefully, because I feel that is the true spirit of my chosen arts of Judo and Jujitsu. I train martial arts so that the delivery of the fatal blow becomes more and more an option for me, and less and less a necessity.

that's a nice ideal, but where I'm at now chances are you will catch a bullet or two by being nice to someone like that and letting them live. then again, you might get shot by his friends anyway.

[treelizard]

haven't read every post on this thread so forgive me for jumping in. And for the record I am not a hunter (yet), though I have skinned and eaten my fair share of road kill and plan on hunting with friends soon. Everyone I know who hunts says they feel sick to their stomach when they do it.

I have a friend, a very good one, who says that he doesn't believe that it is people's right to use violence to hurt one another. I don't either. And that's why I train. And I asked him, point blank, if he doesn't think it's okay for people to hurt or kill each other, why isn't he training to stop them from doing so?

Because you can go blue in the face talking about the psychological ramifications of protecting yourself and the ones you love, but what about the impact of doing nothing and letting the bad guy win? Could you live with yourself? And isn't it better to think of the possibility beforehand? Because a gun, or a knife, or a club, or your bare hands and some training will all kill, and so you better damn will know what you're prepared for before you pick up that first trainer or take that first boxing class.

Somehow I don't think doing a little dance to try to diffuse the situation will be enough in every situation. And yet I've noticed that the more I train the less I get in situations. Of course, avoidance. But I think it changes the way you carry yourself and people can pick up on that energetically and know better than to mess with you. And I am MUCH more likely to get up and walk away before anything escalates one iota if I see my opponent's blood (in my head I mean!!). I can give several examples of situations where the would-be "victim" just stood perfectly still and did nothing but had a weapon in his/her pocket... Not being able to find peace in the chaos could have hurt or killed the "victim" or others.

The point of training with the knife (or guns, or sticks, or any weapons) is in order to use if you are fighting for your life and I have done some pretty incredible things when I've been in dangerous situations. Never knew I could run that fast.

I think it takes a lot of skill level to defend oneself against multiple armed opponents (especially for a 5'4 woman) unarmed and I don't know if I'll reach that skill level in this lifetime. I do know that the more I train the less likely I am to need to use that training.

And there's something in FMA that I havent found to the same extent in other arts I trained in, and that's mindset. They say that your brain builds neural pathways for each thought you have, so you can get stuck in routine patterns neurologically, the path of least resistance so to speak. What if every time you felt afraid you thought about what it means to be the feeder? There are SO many layers to this and how it affects one's life which I am just beginning to unravel, and even this .000001% of unravelling has totally changed my life. There is power in training that goes beyond these drills, it's about learning confidence and for me it's about overcoming FEAR so I can expend my energy on positive things. And it's about helping others... For me to help others I have to open up, and if I am going to be open I DAMN well better know how to defend myself in the best way possible, something beyond tai bo or trying to redirect an axe murderer's energy to the floor without hurting him. And it's a process, it's amazing how many layers there are to training empty-handed, to training with sticks, to training with guns, and especially to training with the knife.

You have a choice. Train for the worst and hope for the best, and learn to take responsibility for everything that happens to you... or spend a lot of time what-iffing and worrying about any potential obstacles

[Tant01]

.....the more I train the less likely I am to need to use that training.

And there's something in FMA that I havent found to the same extent in other arts I trained in, and that's mindset....
...There is power in training that goes beyond these drills, it's about learning confidence and for me it's about overcoming FEAR so I can expend my energy on positive things. And it's about helping others... ...
.... it's amazing how many layers there are to training empty-handed, to training with sticks, to training with guns, and especially to training with the knife.

You have a choice. Train for the worst and hope for the best, and learn to take responsibility for everything that happens to you... or spend a lot of time what-iffing and worrying about any potential obstacles

Thanks Liz... That was very insightful and honest.

Funny how time and space can separate us individually and yet we all eventually come to the same destination on the various diverse paths...

Great post!

Enjoy the journey...


~Ray

[treelizard]

Thanks Ray, but really all credit is due to the people who have invested and continue to invest so much in me...