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"Eil-Ied-fifilfufal, I don't give a damn what's it's called. I tell you Reggie, I've had enough of this hot-arsed, wind-blowin, dirty, dusty son-of-a-bitchin, god forsaken place. I swear I'd just as soon blow that damn palace up myself if I didn't have some ridiculous 'capture and hold' order...
"Stupid sand-nnn...Is this thing on?"
"Hmrphh, cough, er, Today the legitimate afgani government has recieved this videotape which I hold in my hand. It clearly shows the BBC reporter recently captured by terrorists. Said reporter is obviously being forced to read a prepared statement in which his imminent execution is threatened.
"However, in making this tape, our enemy - the black team- has failed to obscure the room in which the hostage os beling held. We have identified that building and even as we speak a daring rescue has been initiated."
(note to interested parties, an assault is launched at the same time as this news brief on the objective. This assault does not follow our original plan, however. Grand commandante Greg the all-high is going to have to do some work and get back with another post later on. Trust me, the assault will not involve a direct storming of the main building.)
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