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I can agree with Lorne's view that MOST of the violence in our society is perpetuated by men. THat is bad, but it is a fact of life. It is NOT however, true that ALL men perpetuate this violence, any more than it is true that ALL victim's of child abuse become abusers when they reach adulthood.
I also agree that WE do share an obligation to change the status quo. Imagine if two-hundred odd years ago, a bunch of rich guys along the eastern seaboard had decided that because things were okay for THEIR families, (they were rich, land-owning gentry), there was no reason to break the ties with England. We DO have an obligation to not be violent towards women or children, or each other. We DO have an obligation to educate others on realistic and practical methods of stopping violence. Ideally, conversation and rational debate can accomplsih that. Unfortunately, their are people in the world who understand no form of "communication" other than physical force. Just as I would not go to a remote village in the the Third World, and expect them to speak English, I do not expect the violence prone to concede to non-violence. For them, I have the ability to use violence in return.
We DO NOT have the right to blindly label all people of ANY group according to our own stereotypes. Just as it's false to say that all blacks are bad swimmers or great basketball players, its ignorance to say that ALL men use violence against women. Just as it's false to say that ALL asians are genius computer programmers/doctors/lawyers/etc, it's ignorant to say that ALL white males are violent predtors and date-rapists.
Do I do my part to help stop violence against women? Absolutely. I grew up in an abusive household. My mother's ex-husband was an abusive alchoholic against her and us. SHe in turn, was abusive to us children. I struggle every single day of my life to remember to NOT use violence as my primary means of communication.
I spread the world to every person I converse with that there are strategies and tactics that will help them avoid being the target of violence.
I would LOVE to find a way to stop violent people from being violent. Unfortunately, becsuse the decision to be violent or not is an individual choice, I cannot make the choice for them, outside of killing them. Since that is not a practical solution, I teach the potential victims to take individual responsibility to protect themselves.
The best method available to STOP violence is the one previously espoused by my respected colleague, Mr. Aldridge. Teach the women you know to protect themselves. If they will not take the time to actually train, point out possible improvised weapons to them in the course of converations. "Gee, that's a nice Mont Blanc pen you have Deborah. It'd sure hurt if yoiu jabbed that in a bad guy's ear canal."
INcidentally, Lorne, the purpose of a flashbang is not to "evoke" anything. the purpose of a flashbang, according to military and law enforcement special operations doctrine is to "stun" the targets into inaction, allowing the assault force a time frame to attack, wherein the enemy is incapable of response.
That seems to be the purpose of your virtual flashbang as well. By posting such an inflammatory thread, you stunned most readers into inaction by causing a state of disbelief that anyone would so greviously misunderstand our stance on this subject.
Good use of the tool, but poor tactics in this case. The tool is useful, when the situation warrants its use. In this case, the operational envirnment did not. Poor use of tactics.
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”
Originally posted by Tom Yum
Ghost, you are like rogue from x-men but with a willy.
*drools*
Originally posted by lorne As a man who has volunteered as a crisis counselor, a public speaker, and a member of the training and development staff with a rape crisis center for the past thirteen years, I would like to challenge the men who read this post to accept some responsibility for :
The fact that men perpetrate the majority of violence in our country (and in every other country as well)- violence against children; violence against women; violence against other men.
The fact that as men, we use violence as a tool for gaining and maintaining our power and control. Racism, sexism, and homophobia are are patriarchal mechanisms of power and control. Those men with the most power in our society (straight, white, affluent men) also wield the most control (control of government, the economy, justice system, and all major media sources).
The fact that men give politically correct lip service to safety, justice, freedom, and equality for women;however, we fail to model this in the real world. Our former president is a rapist and our most successful male recording artist encourages violence against women (including his own mother).
The fact that men are responsible for modeling male/female relationships for young males in our society. What we model is contempt for, and violence against women.
The fact that men consciously, intentionally choose to use violence against women, in all its forms (verbal/emotional abuse, stalking, dating violence, sexual harassment, physical battery, sexual assault, and homicide) because we know it gives us power over...and because we know that we will most likely get away with it (the Justice Department documents that over half of rape defendants are released prior to trial, and of those who are actually convicted, only two-thirds receive a prison sentence: Report Title "Sex offenses and Offenders," l997)
I ask,"How many of you reading this are actively involved to stop it? How many of you benefit from it?" How many of you objectify women every day, violate their boundaries, use porn? What message does this send to young men who look up to you.
Instead of calling me a feminist, which I certainly am (someone who takes action to support safety, justice, freedom, and equality for women), I challenge you to tell me what you are doing to create positive change. I challenge you to acknowledge the ways you use (and benefit from) power and control in your professional and private life.
I hate people like you , do you know why, because you take things back years and undo progress.
Go Screw your self, if i met you i would knock you out.
youre an idiot.
Let me ask you a question what are YOU as a member of the human race doing about the AIDS epidemic in Africa, that is KILLING people, or how about the massacre in the Congo, or what about the fact that no matter how hard i work i cant get anyfurther, ot the fact that i have to listen to idiots like you trying to change the world.
My point is you are doing nothing, telling a bunch of people that already agree with you things they already know.
How dumb can you get.
Dont pretend you are some saint cos you talk to people about rape.
I bet you wouldnt say no if J-Lo was naked in front of you begging you for it.
LOL
Shes hot.
Anyway, p!ss off or say something useful, as for me, im cutting down trees using as much petrol as i can. And i know what women are for. Make of that what you will.
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”
Originally posted by Tom Yum
Ghost, you are like rogue from x-men but with a willy.
*drools*
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”
Originally posted by Tom Yum
Ghost, you are like rogue from x-men but with a willy.
*drools*
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”
Originally posted by Tom Yum
Ghost, you are like rogue from x-men but with a willy.
*drools*
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”
Originally posted by Tom Yum
Ghost, you are like rogue from x-men but with a willy.
*drools*
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”
Originally posted by Tom Yum
Ghost, you are like rogue from x-men but with a willy.
*drools*
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