Would you let it go?

[TNT]

what are your feelings about foul language being used on the mat? ......By a renshi? Should you voice your displeasure or just keep it to yourself?

[Smart Fighter]

If something offends you, you have the right to express that. I dont believe you should ever repress what is a valid feeling. Perhaps both of your opinions may differ, but each of you have the right to express them regardless.

[Tom Yum]

It depends. 'You could say ohhh f@$k my ankle is snapped' or 'that guy beat the sh!t out of me last time we sparred' but otherwise, there shouldn't be excessive cursing.

[gregimotis]

We strongly discourage cursing in the gym. We also discourage the use of words like 'yeah' and 'uh-huh' when talking to instructors. Good manners are the goal - inside, and hopefully outside the gym.

[TNT]

We strongly discourage cursing in the gym. We also discourage the use of words like 'yeah' and 'uh-huh' when talking to instructors. Good manners are the goal - inside, and hopefully outside the gym.

....but would you discuss this with the instructor? I was totally turned off listening to this man say...as he was demonstrating techniques...."you could do this...but if I really want to beat the sh** out of a guy I would do this...." and all I was thinking was...how obnoxious...when I step onto the mat I think all that followed me from outside this place stays outside this place....I draw the curtain on it...including the vulgar language. I don't know how you can hold your "place of the way" in any sort of esteem if you lack decorum.

[gregimotis]

....but would you discuss this with the instructor?

Eeshh, that's a tough one. If he was a temporary instructor, I'd probably let it pass. If he was a permanent instructor... I don't know, I might consider another gym.

it also depends on whether this is routine or exceptional - everybody forgets themselves now and then.

[Tom Yum]

....but would you discuss this with the instructor? I was totally turned off listening to this man say...as he was demonstrating techniques...."you could do this...but if I really want to beat the sh** out of a guy I would do this...." and all I was thinking was...how obnoxious...when I step onto the mat I think all that followed me from outside this place stays outside this place....I draw the curtain on it...including the vulgar language. I don't know how you can hold your "place of the way" in any sort of esteem if you lack decorum.

Good idea. Cursing should be minimized. Its going to happen sometimes, especially at fight gyms with a lot of guys.

That's something that probably scares alot of ladies away from places like boxing and kickboxing gyms. The etiquette level of class isn't victorian, but the ladies that train are there primarily for the training and usually brush off any cursing.

Just my $0.02. Gimmee some change.

[platinum_angel]

you have the right to express your opinion but thats the way some people are. just get used to it. i think your being to critical

[Tziluthi]

I guess it really centres on the head instructor's feelings.

Personally, I don't particularly mind swearing, just as long as it's not directed towards anyone in an insulting manner. It's generally okay just as long as you're in the correct surroundings. The training area (dojo, etc.) is not such a surrounding, in my opinion, nor is it in the opinion of the Shihan I train under. Generally, it's excused in extreme circumstances, such as when severe injury is incurred. However, I make an exception for boxing gyms and the like, because they tend not to follow any sort of ingrained tradition.

But like I said, it really depends on the instructor's feelings, which will generally depend on the type of people in attendance.

[osopardo]

Just my opinion...

There's no place for vulgarity in the vocabulary of a strong, intelligent person who is seeking physical, intellectual and spiritual improvement. To that end, not only do I not lower myself to using such language, I insist that others around me also rise to that higher standard. Usually works unless you're heavily outnumbered (i.e. you're in a gym where the general atmosphere favors that kind of behavior, in which case you're better off not being there).

If it's one to three individuals you're more likely to succeed converting them.

I usuallly stop the offender with a half-joking remark such as; "Please! watch your language. There are gentlemen present." (You might want to try that next time it happens. It works especially well if you're a lady) If that doesn't work I come right back at them with a serious, straightforward request; "I was serious before. I find that kind of language offensive and I'm asking you to be more careful of your speech." I try to deliver that second shot in private. People are more receptive if you don't embarrass them publicly.

I can't remember a time when the offender didn't become apologetic and stopped the gutter talk.


Can't resist a quick story;
There was a military general who fought in the Spanish-American war in Cuba. He was not only respected and admired but actually loved by his soldiers for being one of the common folk. One day he noticed a group of his men laughing and telling stories and he approached them to join in the fun. He was standing there with a smile on his face, listening to a joke, anticipating the punch line, when the man telling the story abruptly stopped speaking.

The general urged him to continue; C'mon, what happened then? Why did you stop?"

The man gestured for him to look behind him and said, "General, a lady was passing by and my story was not fit for a lady to hear."

To which the general replied; "Then why would you think it fit for a gentleman to hear it?" and walked away.

[platinum_angel]

awwww what a touching story

first of all if you would say that to me i would laugh at you. if you can't take swearing when people are joking then how are you going to take it in confrontation. its part of life - deal with it. remember they are just words.

[Tom Yum]

Anyways I'm thinking of posting a poll with the following question; You see a hot girl sucking on a popsicle. What do you think?
A: Wow it must be a really hot day out.
B: OMG is that grape, that is my favorite flavor.
C: Suck on this popsicle.

I'm intrested in which one my fellow male users think of. Sorry ladies but i dont think this is your kind of question.

D: Keep that image in the back of mind for later........hehhe

[osopardo]

First of all, there's a big difference between being "able to take it" and putting up with it. I try to live my life so I don't have to put up with any f'ucking s`hit some ass`hole scumbag punk thinks is ok 'cause he's to f`ucking stoopid to learn a few more words than what he's heard in the streets of the government-subsidized housing project where he makes his smelly, filthy, cockroach-infested home. And anybody who laughs at me when I ask them to behave a certain way out courtesy is just one of those kind of shit'heads which I usually get rid of in short order one way or another or, if I'm in the mood, turn into one of my "pet projects". Able to take it? Hah! I actually took training in verbal abuse at the Metro-Dade Police Academy. Taught us how to listen to some worthless piece of shit tells us what he was going to do to our mother with his clap-dripping dick without us loosing our temper. Uptight? Funny! I been places and done things you haven't even heard of yet, ass'wipe! You got no idea, junior, what I'm capable of and what I'm capable of.

That having been said, I still think it is the mark of a superior person to be able to express themselves forcefully without resorting to vulgarity and I, for one, am striving each day to become a superior person.

"We have a bird down here in the Everglades called a snowy egret. It's plumage is always pure white even though it lives in a muddy swamp. Be like the egret."

[osopardo]

my obscenities can beat your obscenities 22-2!


Convinced?????

[Lizard]

You increase your own cursing, this could work for 2 reasons:

1) He'll realise your better at it than him and his arent going to have an effect anymore...
2) Youll find an area of verbal degredation that even he finds uncomfortable, he will then ask you to stop and you make the counter offer that he must also stop

It could NOT work for 2 reasons:

1) He'll assume that you dont mind
2) He'll see it as a competition and get worse

It's your choice, I reckon you should take the risk.